Hey guys, Candlelitsoul here.
So, I wanted to take a moment before I went to bed, as you can see I'm completely exhausted.
We had to take my cat to the vet today.
She's actually right down here, and she's not very happy because she has to wear a cone.
I know Little Girl, I'm sorry.
She had a flea bite that abscessed and she's now on antibiotic, and she has to wear the
cone . I feel so bad for laughing.
She looks like a satellite dish, and it's, it's so funny trying to watch her walk around
cause she starts backing up to change direction, instead of just turning, it's a hilarious
process, so I feel so bad.
But I wanted to take a moment before I went to bed to say thank you guys for basically
everything.
You guys are amazing.
With the past few weeks that I've had, you guys have just come out of the woodwork and
made me feel absolutely wonderful, and I can't thank you guys enough.
This overall support has just boosted my confidence, its boosted my self esteem, and with the date
that it happens to fall on today, it's just, it's helped so much.
Today is an anniversary day and it's a day that, it felt like it was never going to come.
I felt so weak in comparison to everything, but when I think back on the journey where
I was a year ago, it seems so surreal.
One year ago, I was in a relationship with a guy I thought I was gonna be with forever,
and slowly but surely, it started to prove itself that it wasn't going to be the case.
So, one year ago, I decided to take my life into my hands and, not only make myself happy,
but do something that was gonna better my life and my future.
So, I decided to drop him.
I decided to walk away and start over.
And I didn't know exactly what that was gonna lead into, I knew it was gonna lead somewhere
better, and of course, 100% it did.
As of a couple weeks ago, I was still getting messages from him and it's unfortunate that
after a year that's still happening.
However, it's taught me how strong I can actually be, and to see the year go by, a year I didn't
think I was gonna survive, a year I thought was gonna be fraught with fights and everything
else, it's. it's actually been relatively amazing.
When I started really getting into YouTube, I didn't think it was gonna go anywhere, I
feel so bad for her, and I only had about 55 subscribers, I was totally okay with that,
I was happy, I was like, "Wow", even though I'm sitting here recording my television,
that isn't here anymore, people were still watching and they were still being encouraging
and that's meant so much to me.
Now, we are 134 strong, and it was because I took that initiative that things started
to happen, that people started to notice, and a person last night gave me a shout out,
and it made me feel so wonderful that people are listening to my stories, and my life,
and are able to find some peace and some comfort, and they're able to work through their own
pain.
And that's been my goal all along is I want to take that pain from people, I want to take
that fear, I want to replace it with being able to be comforted, or be able to laugh,
or smile, or even shed a tear if that's exactly what helps you, and working for good causes,
and working to just try to make people's lives better any way that I can.
And I know recently with the video I did, not only the duct tape challenge that allowed
people to laugh and have some fun, with a friend of mine who's been going through hard
times, that video will be there as a reminder to her of what a wonderful person she really
is.
And if I can help at least even one person with videos like this, give them a reason
to keep going, then my job as a human being is, is basically, it's not exactly done , but
it's closer to perfection.
At least in my case.
She doesn't know how to get down from the chair, she's trying.
It's okay Little Girl.
I know, I'm sorry.
But today is that milestone, and looking back, I feel so much better about myself than I
ever have.
I have put on a little bit of weight, but that's okay.
Life is all about the journey, and it's the journey from there where everything started.
I feel so, just so much better, so much lighter, so much freer than I ever have.
I changed my hair color god knows how many times, I'm in the process of changing my wardrobe
style.
It's still gonna be the Gothic that I like, but it's gonna be a different kind of Gothic.
I'm not gonna go over the top, I absolutely promise, that's reserved for special days,
not only Halloween, I love Halloween, but just certain days where my health allows me
to actually do it, and I will post pictures of that when I've taken them, and of course
when I find the clothes to go along with it, that's a little bit of a process seeing as
how chubby I am, but again it's a journey.
And we have all taken this journey together and you guys have been more than supportive,
especially dealing with me and my craziness, and my silly upload schedules, especially
when I had none.
But it's really up to you guys that all of this has come about, and I just thank you
so much for all of this.
You're amazing, and just know that no matter where you are in your life, your dreams can
come true.
Being in a detrimental relationship, or being in debt, or being overweight, or having health
issues should never stop you from chasing that dream, and from doing what makes you
happy.
There are times in my life where I haven't had the support that I've needed from certain
figures in my life whether it be family or friends, but I never gave up.
I wanted to do what made me happy, and this 100% makes me happy.
To be able to see my plants grow, to see this channel grow, to see people laugh, see people
smile, and just know that something I've done has helped in some small way, and whatever
you guys need just know that I'm always gonna be here.
I'm not going anywhere.
And no matter what happens in my life, I will be there to talk to you, and to tell you and
let you know and give you whatever help and encouragement I can, but don't ever stop chasing
your dreams, guys, don't!
I live by a code of the dreamer, that's all I do is dream.
And I absolutely love it, and I will never stop.
I will always be myself no matter who says anything against it because it's me, and I
can't change that, and I won't ever change that.
So guys, don't change who you are.
You're beautiful.
You're special, and I love each and every one of you.
But I'm gonna go ahead and go to bed.
It's been a very long day, I just wanted to say thank you guys, I love you, and I will
see you guys in the next video.
I don't know what it's going to be, but we'll wait and see.
Have a good night guys.
Much love. <3
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