Hi, I'm Jackson Bird and what you are watching here is part two of how I chose my name.
So, I highly recommend that you go and watch part one, if you have not watched it already.
That's where I talk about how I chose my first name and in this video, we're going to be
talking about how I chose my middle name and some regrets that I've sort of had throughout
the name picking process.
So, without any further ado, back to you Past-Even-More-In-The-Past Jackson.
I spent a long time trying to come up with a middle name.
I put off doing any of the legal name changes for a while because I just wasn't settled
on a middle name.
You know, on the one hand, I wanted to go with something like real weird and goofy.
Because like, why not?
I get to change my name.
I get to pick my name.
I never have to be called my middle name so who cares?
I could literally be like, "Danger is middle name."
People'd be like, "hahaha."
"No really. Here's my ID.
Danger is my middle name."
But then I also kind of had the thought like, oh what if I like end up don't liking Jackson
in a while when I'm older.
Maybe I should have like a normal middle name - "normal" - so that I could change my name
to that if I need to at any point.
And then I went back to the like finding a name that really means something and is maybe
after someone really important to me in my life.
And so I thought to one of the most important like male figures in my life during the darkest
time in my life when I was sort of figuring all this out and that was my ex-professor
Eric Selbin, who it still one of the most important people in my life.
But then I realized, my initials would be J-E-B.
Jeb!
Y'know, by the end of the 2016 election, Jeb Bush was seeming like a pretty good candidate,
but at the time, I just - I didn't feel comfortable changing - essentially changing my name to
JEB while Jeb Bush was so much in the spotlight.
And there was another factor, which was I've also had this weird thing where I feel like
"T" is like the best middle initial you could have.
I have definitely read like too much turn of the century literature where authors all
use like their initials and it looks really cool.
So I like, I was really hyper focused on wanting to have "T" as my middle initial.
And that's what most people who were trying to help me brainstorm a middle name like heard
constantly so I actually still have a document in here of all of the T names that me and
my friends brainstormed.
You ready for this? (laughs) This is - these are terrible.
Some of these were jokes.
Although you might be surprised which ones are and which ones aren't.
Thornton.
Thor.
Thomas.
Taylor.
Tesla.
Tiberius.
Texas.
Tyrannosaurus.
Tybalt.
Terrence.
Terrestrial.
Thunder.
Theodore.
Thaddeus.
Tucker.
Teflon.
Tractor.
Tonks.
Tyler.
Tristan.
Thurmin.
Timothy.
I did get a thumb's up from my mom to uh make my middle name Tyrannosaurus Rex.
Or just Tyrannosaurus.
So I was close to doing that.
Of the many regrets I have during the whole name change process one of them is that like
I kind of wish I had just made my middle name Thrasher.
Like, that's pretty cool.
I didn't realize for a surprisingly long time that if I wanted to do two middle names with
Eric being one of them and the T name being the other one that my initials would then
be E.T.
But as soon as I did, I was sold.
That was like (laughs) I can choose totally normal names, but the
goof part will be that my initials are E.T. and there are some days that I regret that.
'Cause it seems a little weird and excessive, but this is one of those things that...
I feel is like what is hard about choosing your own name, especially as a trans person.
Like, if my parents had just named me that, and I had two middle names, and my middle
initials were E.T. it would just be this funny thing of like what my parents did and maybe
they noticed and maybe they didn't and haha and oh but otherwise your name is very nice
and respectable.
But because I chose it, it's like all of the criticism goes on me.
It's like, man you had one job!
There's just so much more self-consciousness wrapped up in choosing your own name and I
feel like especially as trans people because we're getting critiqued and judged for everything
else and people already think that every thing that we're doing is weird and they don't understand
it and this is just like one more place where they want to be invasive and ask more questions
than they would of anyone else in the same exact situation.
I mean that's one reason that I fell back so hard on wanting my first name to be one
that my mom had already been thinking of.
If I ever want to not elaborate for people, I can just say that and they're like, oh yeah
that makes sense.
And I know it's like, it's stupid to feel this pressure and this self-consciousness,
but like, it's real and I think a lot of other trans people that related to their names.
I mean, if you are trans I would definitely like to hear in the comments if you felt that
or are feeling that or have fears around that.
Uhm, and also, if you have advice on how to not feel that because I know that I should
own it and a lot of times I do.
But y'know, you get those creeping voices coming into your head every now and then.
Or the real voices from people in your life.
You don't even need the little voices in your head when you're trans, people will say it
to you anyways!
And if you're not trans and you're watching, tell me about the story of your name.
Is it the name your parents gave you when you were born?
Do you like it?
Do you know why you got named that?
Were you named after someone cool?
Tell me all of the name stories because also hearing all of those stories might help inspire
any trans people who are looking for a name to name themselves.
But yeah, it is hot as Hades in my room right now, even though it just rained.
You'd think it would be cooler.
It's still so hot.
So I'ma go.
But if you liked this video, please do give it a thumb's up and subscribe, if you haven't,
and also you can "ring that bell" as YouTube would like us to say so you can get notifications
when I put up a new video, which hopefully is gonna be more frequently.
Also, you can follow me on all of the social media at jackisnotabird, including now YouTube.
So excited about that.
And hey, if you're interested in supporting me in any way, I do have a Patreon that you
can visit.
Link in the description box.
And that is it!
Thank you so much for watching.
I'll see ya next time.
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