PLOT HOLES
Today in PLOT HOLES ... Jurassic Park 3
GRANT AND ELLIE
Jurassic Park 3 is undoubtedly the worst in the series. It has parts that are phenomenal, but others that do not cool a shit.
And is that the movie begins with a slap of the host for the fans of the first.
Grant and Ellie are not together, they have not had children, which makes the end of the first part lose all its magic.
SHE IS GOING TO PULL ANOTHER
DO NOT FINISH TOGETHER
GREAT WILL NOT HAVE CHILDREN
YOUR DEVELOPMENT AS A CHARACTER DOES NOT WORK FOR NOTHING
SHE'S GOING TO HAVE AN UGLY BOY
EVERYWHERE IDIOTS:
Grant is traumatized after the events of the first part, and says this in a conference:
"There is no divine or human force ... to take me to that island."
Well, unless an untrustworthy guy comes in who says he's the boss of a multinational called Kirby Enterprises that offers him a check with lots of zeros that turns out to be false.
Fuck, how do you trust? A simple look at Google would have sufficed to know that the jambo was lying.
Okay Grant is not very computer, but Billy could have done it, but no.
And speaking of Billy ... to have as a teacher Alan Grant, one of the best paleontologists in the world, does not seem to know much about dinosaurs.
When they see Spinosaurus for the first time, it immediately says that it could be a Suchomimus, which is large but has no dorsal fin,
or the Barionix, which does not have a fin or is that big. It is evident that it looks more like a Spinosaurio.
But do not believe that the Kirby are very intelligent when plotting plan size. The guys did not know there were two islands with dinosaurs, and they go and hire someone who had been in the one who was not.
Anyway, Grant, Malcolm or any other survivor, I do not think it would have been very helpful either.
Let's see, Grant is a paleontologist, you can give some advice ... but to go to the jungle better to bring someone Lara Croft, and not three shoddy mercenaries.
Which, by the way ... did he cheat you with the check? Anyway, idiots everywhere.
DREAMS
The worst of Jurassic Park III is Grant's dream on the plane. It is very shabby, but on top of that it has a tremendous logic flaw.
Why does Alan dream of a velociraptor with feathers on his head? The only ones he knows until that moment are those of the first film, which they did not have.
And that leads me to wonder ... Why the raptors of the second were orange and had no feathers but now they have and are over another color?
Why do some movies have eyes like cat eyes and others with round pupils?
SPINOSAURIO
Yes, it's a shame that poor Tyrannosaurus can not stand an assault against the Spinosaurio, but I love this new dinosaur.
The fight is short, nothing to do with the Jurassic World, but still cool. The problem here is ... where does this dinosaur come from exactly?
How is it that there is not a second in The Lost World and here seems to become the king of the mambo.
During the film they say that dinosaur was not on Ingen's list, as an excuse to put him by surprise, but they do not give any further explanation. I dont know.
LABORATORY
We arrive at the part where they arrive at the famous laboratory where they create the dinosaurs.
The first thing they do is look for something to eat, and they decide to break a vending machine. They get some chocolates and ready.
But it is that this site has been abandoned for more than 5 or 6 years, it has to be all more expired than the host.
And Paul does not take anything. Instead, he decides to make the macho and try to break one himself.
It goes wrong and goes limping. But uncle, at least take some food that is already broken.
Anyway, the guys are walking through the lab and then Amanda sees a raptor head in formaldehyde.
But no, it's a trap. The raptor is very clever, but ... is he really that smart?
That dinosaur has probably never seen a human, how did he know he could cheat him by making it look like his head was decapitated inside a tank of formaldehyde?
Are you able to understand those concepts? And a raptor is quite big, because the angle would have to see the back too much, I say.
WIRED
Attentive to what Hammond says in the previous movie.
"With dozens of species that live in their social groups ... without barbed wire, without borders ...".
On Sorna Island there are no barbed wire but ... Yes, at least one. Of pretty bad quality by the way. It breaks with nothing.
And the best thing is that the protas run to a small building, put a couple of latches and ... the Spinosaurio can no longer enter.
The only explanation is witchcraft. And beware that there is not only a fence, but also an entire fold for pteranodons.
And why is all this if Hammond says that the dinosaurs were moved to the park immediately after birth?
THE OXIDIZED AVIARY
It turns out that much of these facilities are shitty and fall apart. When they are crossing the bridge they decide to pass one by one because it could fall at any time.
Well, it seems that the quality of the bridge was better than expected, because it can withstand the weight of an adult Pteranodon and a lot of people running and screaming. By the way, the best scene in the movie.
EVERYWHERE CASUALTIES
Sorna Island is huge, but even so, our beloved protagonists are very lucky and easily find everything.
By chance they find the remains of the parachute with the skeleton of the uncle of the beginning all eaten.
I do not know how they ate it while being on top of a tree, but good. The same has decomposed very fast, but that takes a lot more.
But let's continue with the coincidences. Alan Grant is lost, but Eric accidentally arrives and saves him with his last two smoke cans. Pretty Deus ex machina.
And then also the parents find Erik and Grant thanks to the music on the phone. Although he does not have it, but the Spinosaurio, which by the way,
How can you hear the music on the phone from so far away being in the stomach of the dinosaur?
Does not it break down with stomach acids or what? Well, the same is that it is a Nokia.
But we can still continue. And it's just that by chance, going down the river, they find the fucking phone in a huge fucking cairn.
The Spinosaurio had to go to full milk to shit from the point where we left it the last time there. And one last mistake of gift.
Why when Grant calls Ellie in the United States is day and night? Sorna Island is quite close to Costa Rica, there is not much time difference.
And back to the beginning of the film ... just the boat goes through a fog that is coincidentally full of carnivorous dinosaurs that are charged to the two types.
Again a contradiction with the second movie.
"Carnivores are isolated in the interior of the island. The team may remain on the outer perimeter. "
EX MACHINE ARMY
One of the worst things about Jurassic Park 3, apart from the family plot, is the end.
You hear the noise of a helicopter, arrive at the beach and see a turkey alone in the sand with a megaphone.
And suddenly, several army amphibians and helicopters magically appear triumphantly and rescue them.
It does not make fucking sense. Why have not they left before? What were you waiting for? What did they eat at the megaphone? Was it a bait or something?
Why do they just appear in the exact place where Grant and the others are? And the most important. How does Ellie make the army go to the island? Nobody explains it.
Why could not they have sent the army from the beginning to rescue the kid? And how is it that they rescued badly hurt Billy? But if the river took it.
And that leads me to wonder ... Where was the current of that river? If the path that Grant takes with the boat is towards the coast ...
How did Billy get there so fast? It's all a bit weird.
PTERANODONES
As I said in the video of The Lost World, in the end you see several pteranodons loose, which contradicts this movie.
But it is not what I want to highlight. The problem here is that the pteranodons escape and nobody seems to give a shit.
They are big, aggressive, they kill people, they almost kill Billy, they almost eat Eric ... And Grant goes and says:
"Maybe they are looking for a new place to nest. It's a new world for them "
Do not laugh, fuck, they are dangerous. Throw them a missile or something.
BONUS: AREA B
As I am superfan of this saga, I could not pass up the opportunity to try to solve many of these questions that I have been formulating over time.
Many of them can be solved easily explaining a little more the history of the island,
so I decided to write a mid-line prequel screen intro to fill in these holes like frog DNA.
It's titled LA ZONA B, and you can read it completely in frikimalismo.com and if it has script holes I hope you let me know.
And finally, taking advantage of the fact that I upload the video to YouTube, I have decided to answer a few questions that some of you raised in the original video.
Some say Grant and Ellie were not a couple in the first movie. It is true that in the book they were not, but in the movie Grant makes it very clear to Malcolm during his car trip that they are more than friends.
In that same scene Malcolm makes reference to that it has many children and that it loves to him, although that also is contradicted with something that Kelly reproaches to him during the second film.
Another thing that was commented is that it makes sense that there are different types of kidnappers. Let's see, they are all genetic experiments, because they may have done them with different physical traits, but I find it inconsistent that they change their appearance in each of the first three films when they stopped incubating them at the same time.
The argument that in El Mundo Perdido are in another area of Sorna Island is weird, because it is the same island bitch; If Spinosaurio, who is capable of charging the rex, would have liked to go to the other end of the island, he could have done it without problems. The same with the kidnappers. Anyway, all this is something that I try to explain in the script that I wrote.
It also seems that Ellie's husband worked in something of the Navy, I do not remember that dialogue well. But it is curious that just make a call the uncle and managed to convince his superiors to mobilize several aircraft carriers and helicopters and set sail for Sorna Island in one night to save 5 mindundis.
Let's see, the island is to take for the United States ass. But the host arrives quickly because this guy has said: hey, that a friend of my wife is in danger, we all go, huh?
Seriously, if Kirby had gone to Ellie in the first place and told him about his son they would have saved him. Or maybe it would have led to another more interesting movie. But beware that even so, with all its faults, Jurassic Park III I really like it. It is very undervalued because the comparisons are odious but it has very good parts.
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