Youtube daily Aug 8 2017

- Oh my god, Amanda, did you see "Game of Thrones" last night?

Um, do I love my HBO family?

Hey, boos.

So at the beginning, brother D, honey,

he had the hottest night Mandalay Bay.

He's making it rain counting up all his winnings.

- Meanwhile, vintage Mia Farrow just booked herself

a Wells "Far-gross" commercial.

- You can count on the Iron Bank's support

as soon as the gold arrives.

- So then, back at Winterfell,

Earl Gray is breaking the ice with baby miss Cleo,

but he's like, bitch, you can't fool me.

I saw your old tweets.

- Chaos is a ladder.

LITTLEFINGER (VOICEOVER): Chaos is a ladder.

- He's like, you can't put me on the shit.

I put you on the shit.

Three eyes.

- And then baby "Kill Bill"

rolls up to club Winterfell, and they're like,

you are not on the list.

And she's like, listen up, trick.

My sister's DJ-ing tonight.

- Tell Sansa her sister's home.

- And then baby "Kill Bill" and Sansa fierce

are back together reunited, and it's oh so good.

- And then they have the most intense sleep over ever.

- However long my list got, he was always first.

- Your list?

- Of people I'm going to kill.

[CHUCKLING]

- So the Starks are all back together again,

and let me tell you, this year's Christmas card

is gonna be ugly.

- Then Jon Snow takes Christina Aguilera down

to the Keith Haring exhibit, where he "cave-splains"

all the art to her.

- They were here together, the children and the first men.

- At the end, brother D, he's ready to go home, take off

that hand, polish it up, let the cat butthole breath,

when he realizes there is something amiss.

- Listen.

- It's like waiting for your period to come.

There's a rumble.

You're not feeling right.

Then you look down, and it's like, fuck.

- Fill the gaps!

- Oh my god, just get that girl a DivaCup.

- We'll see if you're that excited when you pull

out a cup of your own blood.

- Here's the thing.

If you don't want to use a DivaCup on your mooncycle,

I support that.

[LAUGHTER]

I support that.

You use whatever you want to use.

I'm so pro pussy.

I love vaginas.

- Because you don't have one!

- And I don't have to be in one, so I love them.

I love them from afar.

I'm like, yes, namaste, vagina.

- No, vaginas are very pesky.

It's like you never get a handle on them.

They're always running away from you, like ah, ah, ah,

yeast infection!

- All of a sudden, a whole Groupon of Dothraki

appear.

They are doing full soul cycle, second position,

and the toughest teacher is leading the class.

Feel that burn.

- Push through the pain.

- Pump them legs.

- Don't forget to breathe.

- How you guys doing?

I can't hear you.

- Sweat, bitch.

The only person happy right now is Dickon, because for once,

nobody's clowning his name.

- Rickon.

- Dickon.

[LAUGHTER]

- And then used car salesman's Blue Apron

delivery shows up, and this week it's all about dragon kebabs.

- But Christina is not letting this plane go down,

and she does a full Sully and pulls a miracle on the Hudson.

But brother D is not happy about her Kerri Strug killer landing.

- You fucking idiot.

- And the last thing we see

is brother D making like the heart of the ocean,

just sinking.

This hair is giving me full on the artist formerly known

as Cersei, but currently Sansa.

But I feel like this is my Khaleesi dragon riding hair.

Dracarys!

Where are--

My dragons?

[WHOOSH]

[CREAKING]

[WHOOSH]