-Now, I thought I'd share some of my favorite
#MyWeirdTeacher stories from you guys.
Here we go. The first one is from @Steve-Shu.
He says, "The day after we turned in drafts
of our term papers, the professor wore all black
to signify his disappointment in our work."
[ Laughter and applause ]
-He had to tell them, too.
Wouldn't figure that one out for yourself.
-I'm mourning the loss of your grades, yeah.
This one is from @JonBalun.
He said, "My teacher moved his left hand in circles
as he erased the board with his right hand
so he would build the muscles evenly."
[ Laughter and applause ]
-Wax on, wax off.
-Miyagi. Miyagi, yeah.
This one is from @tinagibala.
She says, "My homeroom teacher kept a list on the chalkboard
of people who needed prom dates."
-Aw. [ Audience aws ]
[ Applause ] Oh.
Tina?
You and Gary. -Derek's been up here for --
[ Light laughter ]
For three weeks now. So anyone wants -- Anyone.
You know anyone who wants to go with Derek, or any --
Do you have any pets at home that could maybe go with Derek?
Just so he doesn't go alone.
This one is from @leighlo-maria.
She said, "My biology teacher handed us back
our graded homework. Every paper was maroon.
She apparently spilled a bottle of red wine."
[ Laughter and applause ]
-Yoinks!
[ Pop ]
-This one's from @Corcorcoran2.
He says, "If it was your birthday, my teacher would draw
a cake on the board and ask you to blow out the candles.
You just had to stand there and blow on the chalkboard
until he said the candles went out."
[ Laughter and applause ]
Not yet! -Not yet!
-Not yet, keep going. [ Laughs ]
-Not yet! -[ Fake crying ]
-Okay. Oh, they're trick candles, they're back on again.
What's your problem, dude?
-I'm in charge! -[ Laughing ] Yeah.
I'm the boss, get it?
This one's from @HBP-ALWAYS98.
She says, "Whenever I ask my teacher what we're doing today,
she says, 'working hard and suffering greatly,
because life is pain.'"
-Oh. [ Applause ]
Wow! -[ Laughs ]
This one's from @mac-ken-cheese.
-Oh, nice. -I get it.
Not bad. Mac n' cheese.
-Mac n' cheese. -Mac Ken Cheese.
-Nice one. -That's a nice one.
-Yeah.
-mac-ken-cheese.
She says, "My chemistry teacher had a taxidermied armadillo
in the classroom. For a while, it wore a party hat
and it was called The Partydillo."
[ Laughter ] -Yeah!
-Whoop whoop whoop!
-Partydillo! -Byeh, byeh, byeh, byeh!
-Raise the roof, Derek!
[ Laughter ]
-The armadillo said that? -Yeah.
[ Laughter ]
-This is from @RaskolnikovsAxe.
-Ooh, deep.
[ Light laughter ]
A little crime and punishment.
Derek.
[ Light laughter ]
-He says, "At the end of a test period,
our science teacher would respond to our
'one more sec, one more sec!' with 'no more secs!'"
[ Laughter ]
"No more secs in this classroom!"
[ Applause ]
I'm talking to you, Derek.
-Yeah.
This last one's from @TheDonald-Stump.
[ Light laughter ]
He says, "My teacher would tell us to work hard in math
and science classes, otherwise we'd end up
as a gym teacher. He was also the gym teacher."
-Oh! -There you go.
There are your "Tonight Show" hashtags.
To check out more of our favorites,
go to tonightshow.com/hashtags.
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