- [Johnny] It's time for another episode of.
- [Audience] Who Gets The Money?
(audience applauding)
- Alright, welcome to Who Gets The Money?
The official game show of the Republican tax plan.
It's time to meet our contestants.
First, she's from Wisconsin.
She's seven years old, mighty adorable.
Give it up for Chloe.
(upbeat music) (audience clapping)
Okay, Chloe, tell us about yourself.
What do you do for a living?
- I'm in second grade.
- So a useless drain on society.
Noted.
And all the way from the mean streets of Fifth Avenue
in New York City, their dad is president of
the United States of America,
give it up for, whoa. (eerie music)
Geeze, sorry, I didn't see you guys there.
It's spooky, very spooky.
Give it up for the Trump family.
(audience cheering)
Don Junior, Eric, and Ivanka.
Welcome to the show.
Looking great.
So handsome, so handsome.
You got great genes.
The best genes.
Okay, you know the rules.
We're gonna push the Republican tax button.
When the wheel spins, we see.
- [All] Who Gets The Money.
(audience applauding)
- Trump kids, you get to go first.
Push the button, and we'll give the wheel a whirl.
(coughing)
You know what?
You shouldn't have to push your own button.
Allow me.
(audience applauding)
(exciting music)
Here we go.
Wow, estate tax cut. (audience applauding)
So great for rich people.
Chloe, how much is your parents' estate worth?
- Estate?
- Yeah, you know like when your parents die,
how many millions of dollars will you get?
- My parents are gonna die?
- [Audience] Aww.
- Adorable, adorable.
Don Junior, Eric, and Ivanka,
your dad says he's worth 10 billion dollars.
Wow. (audience cheering)
That's a lot of dollars.
The Republican plan cuts the estate tax
for the wealthiest families in America
to absolutely zero, which means
you net an additional 3.99 billion dollars.
(exciting music) (audience cheering)
Wow.
Oh, oh.
Man, I wish my dad was president, God.
- Did I win, too?
- Of course you did, Chloe.
God, get off my back.
Tell her what she won, Johnny.
- [Johnny] Chloe, you won a 193 billion dollar
cut to the nutrition assistance program
that keeps kids like you from going hungry.
(alert buzzing)
- Oh, wow.
Better luck next time, Chloe.
- Why couldn't we just use some of their
tax cuts to feed the hungry kids?
- What are you, like a communist?
- What's a communist?
- Look in the mirror.
Give me that doll. (audience applauding)
Give me that doll.
That doll doesn't belong to you,
it belongs to the Trumps.
Trumps, this is for you.
- [Johnny] This has been Who Gets The Money,
brought to you by the Republicans in Congress,
and Trump Vodka, the Trump Russia connection
that goes down smooth.
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