Spider creep me out. (playful, rhythmic music)
I mean I guess I've never liked spiders.
I was born with arachnephobia, okay?
In our part of the country there are only two spiders
that you really need to worry about.
And guess what?
They don't like livin' out here in the woods.
They like livin' in, close to home, with you.
The first one, I think most people are familiar with,
is called the Black Widow.
This is about a spider that's about,
oh about a half inch long, and it's very easy to identify,
because it has a shiny, bulbous abdomen, shiny and black,
and it also has, on the underside,
this bright red hourglass marking.
A black widow is not an aggressive spider.
It's not really a hunter.
What it does in and around your homes,
it seeks out
hidden, dark, dry, cool places
and it waits for it's prey to come to it.
Another classic place,
if you're one of those people
that still doesn't see the benefits of indoor plumbing,
and I think you should,
is the seat in the outhouse.
So just be forewarned there.
What happens if a black widow bites you?
The bite is going to feel like a needle goin' in.
Sometimes a black widow will bite you
and not put any venom in at all,
but let's say it has.
In most cases, over the next 24 hours you're gonna develop
these absolutely agonizing muscle aches and tremors,
probably for 24 hours,
but sometimes it can go on for as much as a week.
So my advice to you is, "Go to the doctor!"
And if you can, and you killed the spider,
take the spider with you when in a little jar.
The doctor's really gonna appreciate that.
He or she can give you a definite diagnosis of the problem.
But chances are you'll be okay in a couple of days.
The next spider we have to worry about,
it's called the Brown Recluse.
The reason it's called recluse is
because it's not an aggressive spider.
It doesn't wanna come in contact with you.
This spider is about three quarters inches long,
it's kind of easy to identify
because on the top of it's head it has a marking
that looks like a violin.
The spider itself is kind of a light brown color
with long, spindly legs.
How do you get bitten by a brown recluse?
This happened to me.
Instead of hanging up my jeans, I just took 'em off,
threw 'em on the floor, went to bed, everything's fine.
Next morning, get up, first thing I do,
put on my jeans, I go out.
And I got bitten
on the butt.
When a brown recluse bites you, you'll never know.
It's a totally painless bite.
The first time you will be aware that you've been bitten
is probably about the day after.
What it does is,
it's really gross,
it's venom dissolves tissue.
It basically takes your flesh
and turns it into this soupy goop that dies.
In most cases the bite will heal by itself,
but it takes a long time.
You're gonna have that bite on your body for up to a month.
But sometimes, if there's a lot of venom, it can get so big
that you can get an area this big on your body
in which the flesh turns black and dies.
And the only way to fix that
is through surgery to close the wound.
If you don't want to be bitten by one of these spiders
take a flashlight to the outhouse
and shake out your pants before you put 'em on.
Or else you could get bitten in the butt.
(growling)
Không có nhận xét nào:
Đăng nhận xét