-Guys, this is very exciting.
The Mega Millions jackpot
is now a record high $1.6 billion.
[ Cheering ]
Of course, after taxes, that's around $900 million.
[ Laughter ]
Or if you're President Trump, $1.6 billion.
[ Laughter, cheers, applause ]
That's right, the jackpot for tomorrow's drawing
is $1.6 billion, which means, for just $2,
you have a chance to lose just $2.
[ Laughter and applause ]
You see this is going viral.
over the weekend, Texas Senator Ted Cruz
tried to do a campaign event using Facebook Live.
But he had some technical difficulties.
Watch this.
-Secure the border. How do you do that?
Build a wall. But a wall's not everything.
You use tech-- You use infrared.
[ Laughter ]
You use fixed-wing and rotary-wing aircraft.
By the way, let me say, for the technical thing,
are we sideways? Someone call --
Because at least on your computer screen, we're sideways.
-Like an episode of "NYPD Blue" at this point.
-Okay, don't put your hand over the camera.
-All right, I think you need to hold it vertically.
I don't know that, but it's sideways
when you're holding it horizontal.
Okay, hold it vertically.
-It tells you it won't let you.
-Okay. -All right.
-It's perfect. Just leave it right there.
-Perfect. Lift it just slightly up.
Emily, you're now broadcasting...
[ Laughter and applause ]
-Wow.
Wow!
That's everyone's dad trying to use FaceTime.
It's like, "Am I on? Am I -- can I see --
Honey, is that --"
[ Laughter ]
You guys hear about this? The other day,
Trump's Chief of Staff, John Kelly,
and his National Security Advisor John Bolton
made headlines for getting into a giant shouting match
outside the Oval Office. That's not good.
Well, we actually got our hands on the audio.
Yeah, listen to what they were fighting about.
-The song of the summer was "In My Feelings," by Drake!
-What?!
It was clearly "Why Don't You Just Meet Me in the Middle"!
-Oh, come on! ♪ Kiki, do you love me ♪
♪ Why don't you just meet me in the middle ♪
-♪ Are you riding ♪ -It's such a great song.
♪ Say you'll never, ever leave from beside me ♪
♪ Just meet me in the middle ♪
-I know who sang it, but it's a fantastic --
-Unh-unh! -Yeah!
-Aah!
-Wow. What a fight.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Some entertainment news -- the new "Halloween" movie
won the box office this weekend.
And I saw that it takes place 40 years after the original.
Yeah, you can tell Michael Myers is getting old
'cause whenever he busts into a room,
it takes him a minute to remember why he went in.
[ Laughter and applause ]
"Am I -- Oh, yeah, yeah."
Michael Myers is old, man.
He's so old, he wears mask on a beaded string around his neck.
-Really? [ Laughter and applause ]
-He's old. -Is he old?
-Michael Myers is so old, midway through the movie,
he just sits down and watches Fox News.
-Really? -Yeah.
[ Laughter and applause ]
He's just old. -How old is he?
-Michael Myers, the -- the -- the murdering
star of the film "Halloween"...
-"Halloween." Yes, yes.
-...is so old... -How old is he?
-He's so old, at the end of the movie,
he says something vaguely racist at Thanksgiving.
-Really? -That's how the movie -- Yeah.
[ Laughter and applause ]
-Guys, I'm not sure if you guys saw this
but last week, at the Sacramento Kings game,
some fans were trying to distract players
from the other team by holding up giant pictures of my face.
[ Laughter ]
Like, I'm not even joking. This is real.
Take a look. This is not PhotoShopped.
That's a real -- [ Laughter ]
That's great.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Well, it must have worked,
because I'm thousands of miles away
and that's still distracting for me.
Well, I was kind of curious
to see what other people thought about this,
and what better person to ask than the Alabama Face Guy.
You guys may remember him.
A few years ago, he was a student
at the University of Alabama,
and he'd go to these basketball games
and hold a giant picture of himself
to distract the other team.
[ Laughter ]
While he made that same face.
Well, this is 100% true.
We hired that guy as an intern here.
[ Laughter ]
And he's actually been working at "The Tonight Show"
for the past three years as a video researcher.
So let's bring him out now.
Jack Blankenship, a.k.a. the Alabama Face Guy.
♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
-How you doing, Jack? How are you?
-Hey, Jimmy. Hi, everybody! How's it going?
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Jack, as the Alabama Face Guy, what'd you think
about those people holding those huge pictures of me
at the Kings game?
-I thought it was pretty funny,
but I'll be totally honest, Jimmy.
I kind of got a new thing going on now.
-What? What's your new thing?
-Oh, playing the melodica with my nose.
-I'm sorry?
Jack, I don't know if that's gonna catch on.
You're the Alabama Face Guy.
That's you're thing. Like, that thing.
[ Laughter ] Yeah.
-Well, not anymore, Jimmy.
I mean, I've been practicing the melodica through my nose
alone in my apartment
every night for the past several months.
And I've never been happier. I mean, I used to be like this.
[ Laughter ]
-Yeah. -And then I went to this.
[ Laughter, cheers, applause ]
And now I feel comfortable enough
to play it with The Roots, if that's okay.
-I mean, Quest, what do you think?
-Sure. Why not? Let's do it.
-Do you have a melodica?
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Got one right here. [ Laughter ]
-Uh, all right, go for it. Let's hear it.
[ "Old Time Rock 'n' Roll" plays ]
♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪
♪♪
♪♪
♪♪
♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Jack Blankenship, everybody, the Melodica Nose Guy.
-Thank you so much.
-[ Breathes deeply ]
[ Laughter ]
That's -- That's his new thing.
-That's his new thing.
-Can we have security drag him out of the building, please?
[ Laughter ]
Jack, are you still here?
-Yes. Yes, hey.
-No, no -- [ Laughter ]
You don't need to be here any more.
Your bit's done.
It was -- It was weird.
[ Laughter ]
But, uh --
[ Audience "Awws" ]
Wait, wait. What? What are you doing?
Why are you with a panda?
What is happening?
Oh, my God.
#WhatAreYouGuysDoingTogether.
All right, I'm sorry. It wasn't weird.
You can play it if you want to.
[ Cheers and applause ] Yeah.
♪♪
All right, all right, that's it! That's enough, that's enough.
That's enough. That's good, that's good.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Wow. Who knows. Who knows.
-Who knows. [ Laughter ]
Get this -- last week, a couple visited Disney World in Orlando
and Disneyland in California all in the same day.
People said, "Sounds like a fun time,"
while the couple said, "We're looking for our son."
[ Laughter and applause ]
"Jeremy?! Jeremy?!"
[ Laughter ]
Finally, the World Series starts tomorrow,
and I heard that if someone steals a base,
everyone in America gets a free taco from Taco Bell.
[ Cheers and applause ]
It's called "Steal a base, steal a taco,"
which is better than the original name,
"Run for the runs."
You guys, we have a great show tonight.
Give it up for The Roots.
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