Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh hello everybody my name is Nicksora and today
I want to share with you my story of my reversion how I came to Islam I know a lot of people find
these kind of videos very inspiring and motivational for their own Iman and own faith and so I hope you
enjoy my journey to Islam so I am from an Irish family from a Catholic background and although
on a day-to-day basis religion wasn't exactly an important thing we don't go to church
we celebrated Easter and Christmas and my my father would talk to me about Jesus a lot
and I knew all of the stories of the Injeel and the Torah you know the Bible and the Old
Testament and knew them and I've grown up with them the problem was is that I had always
had this feeling inside of me it was like something was missing like a very empty feeling
and I tried so many things to try and get rid of this feeling some of them good some
of them bad I took new friends I made a lot of new friends I was fully very badly at school
so I turn to other sources online other places to try and find friends also because of the
bullying because of some things which happened in my life some abuse and bad situations that
I went through I turned to drugs and I used drugs for maybe about a year and one day I
was trying to stop using drugs and I was checking through the TV and I came down with those
Christian channels and they had this man on there with his gospel choir and I was really
inspired I was like wow these songs are beautiful and look at my love for God look at their
love for Jesus as well and this was something that as I started to quit drugs it was something
I really turned to and relied on their love and connection to God really inspired me but
I myself didn't wasn't able to have that connection like that because I had a lot of problems of Christianity
I had studied the extensively studied Bible extensively and I'd ask my father questions
I'd say okay this this verse in one of the Gospels says this and this verse says this these
kind of contradict why or this says this what does it mean and people didn't have these
answers for me and the answers that they gave were not satisfying was more kind of
this is what happened trust it go with it do you know what I mean it was kind of accepted
and I wasn't really very happy with that so I drifted away from that from Christianity
I went to college I made some friends I got on okay and then I lost my grandfather my
grandfather was one of most important people in my life and to a degree he still is even
though he's gone from this earth because he was not only a schoolteacher but he was a
firefighter he was an amazing man so brave so inspiring anybody that met him loved him
and he was very young when he passed away and it was very unexpected and he used to
take care of me we used to go on holiday together so it really badly affected me for a long
time and actually I was angry at God I didn't understand why he'd taken my grandfather away
from me um when he was so young when I needed him he was teaching me to drive at the time
and I just wanted to make him proud so I was angry I was upset and I'd say for the best
part of two years and then I decided I wanted to try and resolve this anger and hurt so I
started thinking to other religions I already knew I had problems with Christianity so I
looked into Judaism because I liked how they stuck very close to the Scriptures and they
didn't have the problem of this of the three of the Trinity um so but I wasn't comfortable
in Judaism because I just could not deny the existence of Jesus and then I looked into
Buddhism and actually I found it I found it very peaceful but I did not find that it was
a religion that sought to answer questions they don't seek to answer questions they say
you reflect and accept so that was also something that didn't work for me so at the time as
a stall time the media was betraying Islam very badly they would say Muslims a terrorist
Islam says this and I was working with a journalist and I wanted to understand why they were saying
this because I knew working in media but a lot of the things that the media saying says
is distort the truth to put it lightly I myself did not work with any stories to do with Islam
because my focus was on Northeast Asia so um I wanted to understand I had a lot of Muslim
friends and this portrayal of Islam the media did not reconcile with how my friends were
so I was scrolling through I was in one day and looking for books and I came across a
book called from MTV to Mecca this title made me smile I thought this is a strange title for
a book look at this about and my Christian backer who was a and MTV presenter in Germany
and I was curious I wanted to know why would a white German woman want to become Muslim so
I downloaded the book and I started reading and as I started reading it really inspired
me to want to know more about Islam so in August 2012 I downloaded a copy of the Quran
on Kindle and I started reading and as Allah subhana WA Ta'ala says in Surah Ar-Rahman he says
over and over again which one of the favours of
your Lord will you deny and this is how I felt when I read the Quran I was reading it
that I always had a very scientific mind I'd always loved science especially human
biology and you know just the explanation of how you go from a drop of sperm into a
human being they're the layers of the seven heavens things about space the air we breathe
the two seals which do not meet subhanAllah it was then I knew how can this written 1,400
years ago in the desert by a man who could not write who was not educated how could all
of these things have been known so after I read the Quran I didn't immediately decide
to become Muslim because I still had these thoughts of okay so these bad things are being
said about Islam why there must be something more to it so I spent days upon days hours
upon hours online watching videos on YouTube from scholars reading articles by scholars
and everyday people if you wrote an article at that time I probably read it just just
to learn more just to understand and I got really interested in a hadith I really love
hadith studies I really love it um I love the wise sayings and there's so many miraculous
things revealed in them as well so it was after a few months of really looking into
it really taking time to research that I woke up one day in November 2012 I think it's the
12th of November and no it was the 10th of November my mistake the 10th of November 2012 and I
knew I had to become Muslim so I didn't really know what to do so I look into online
what do i do how do i how do I do this and I didn't realize you have to take a shower
and things like that but the bottom line is it of it once that I took my Shahada and as
soon as I took my Shahada I felt so much tranquility so much peace and I you know when
people say when you take your Shahada when you become Muslim it's like you're a newborn
baby all of your sins are forgiven I completely felt that and after the life I'd had I really
I really need the my sins to be forgiven but I just felt so at ease and I you know
said so many prayers with all my at home because I wanted to be accepted into this wonderful
faith so that's how I came to take my Shahada and one of the things I found about
Islam was that it really was an extension of Christianity they accepted Jesus as a prophet
which is something that I could agree with and he had all of the familiar stories it
did not deny them and but it had answers that I had never had before it really answered
my problems were with the Trinity and with God and all of a sudden I felt like I I knew
I had an idea of how to know God and you know I really wanted to take my Shahada because
I couldn't deny it any longer the more I read the more I suddenly understood that there
is no God and Allah the Arabic word just means one God that's all there is to it it's
not a different God it's the same God of the Jews at the Christians and
I couldn't deny that Prophet Muhammad SAW had came and had delivered this
wonderful message from God and it gave me that peace that I had from all of that trouble of losing
my grandfather because I suddenly understood
because from God we come into him we return that's it that's life and suddenly I was able
to reconcile everything and I will make another video to tell you that afterwards I had a
lot of struggles and if you are a revert and you want to tell your family about your reversion
or you're having troubles after telling your family about your reversion or you just want
to know what happened next insha'Allah I'll be do for that video and I started to wear
the hijab maybe a year after my reversion a good friend of mine who support me all the
way through Alhamdulillah said to me baby steps you have to take your landing your praying
everything the way you dress everything in baby steps and so that's what I did I mean
I didn't immediately be able to pray five times a day I didn't know how to pray it took
me a long time to memorize what to say to memorize even you know there's three Surah
that you need for prayer or at least you know so it took me quite a long time to be
able to do that and now here we are Alhamdulillah so that's my story I hope you have Inshallah
found it beneficial and interesting and insha'Allah we make a follow up video
and thank you so much for watching and see you soon Salamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh
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