Hey I'm Dan Johnson, the author of way
too many books about confidence and in
this video I want to share with you
three of my favorite proven strategies
for being more confident. Now if you're
new here, our mission of Dreams around
the world is to help you become the best
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you love,
so do consider subscribing. So if
someone's working with me and they're
trying to figure out how to be more
confident the first thing I look at is
their actions. First, simple level
physiology how are you using your body
are you like hunched over all day eating
potato chips being like I have feel so
crappy about my life oh my god I'm
surprised surprised you don't feel the
most confident when you're putting junk
in your body you're using terrible body
language and also you're probably doing
things you're not that proud of right
none of us feel that confident when
we're wake up really hungover having
spent too much money the night before
and possibly being in some Mexican
brothel not knowing where we are never
happened to me but if it did happen to
me I probably would not feel the most
confident the next day so our actions
are huge first as I said physiology so
are you standing up tall are you walking
confidently bla bla bla you know are you
talking with some kind of force to
basically tell yourself that you're
confident and then I know it sounds
really stupid but you try it right now
if you can when you're watching this
video like if you're sitting kind of
feeling down probably if you're looking
for how to be more confident videos
you're not feeling amazing today so try
standing up actually and like putting
your shoulders back and moving your
hands like you have something important
to say like you're a 1940's dictator do
you feel a bit better probably do now in
terms of actions as well I like to think
of the higher level like are you
recycling right hear me oh if you're
someone who believes that recycling is
important and we should care about the
planet and you don't believe it's some
big conspiracy by the plastics whatever
then probably when you don't recycle it
you feel bad because part of you is like
looking at yourself saying wait then you
tell people you care about the
environment but then you just throw your
plastics in the garbage what kind of a
person are you
and it sounds small but it's not small
if we constantly watch ourselves you
don't watch yourselves a little good and
bad devils or whatever on our shoulders
see how I said there's a good devil then
no angels it's just two different
versions of the devil's if you're
constantly watching yourself and you're
not doing things that align with your
values and your beliefs it's going to
erode your self-confidence it's going to
make you feel really bad about yourself
there's no way around that so people do
one of two things they either change
their actions which is what I highly
recommend change your actions to align
with your beliefs and your values or
maybe change your values like maybe
you're a fundamentalist Christian but
you're also gay and you also like I
don't know what else can Christians do
you like doing other stuff that
Christians aren't allowed to do like
believing in evolution maybe that's you
well you might want to look at your
belief system because if you stay a
fundamentalist Christian and you also
love say science and men and your man
that might cause some serious issues for
you internally right and people do the
craziest things to align this stuff and
make it all work together and they
convince like they come up with these
elaborate stories bla bla bla to make it
all okay I would say find beliefs that
are true to you find your values that
are true to you and then have your
actions aligned with them sounds simple
it's not if something people spend their
entire lives doing still on the topic of
actions actually doing stuff tends to
make us feel really good and feel
confident if you find yourself in a spot
where you're really just not feeling
good about a certain part of your life
let's say it's your health
have you ever noticed that you can feel
really bad about your health say your
fitness level that you just aren't good
at running or cardio or that kind of
thing and then you go out for one run
and suddenly you feel really good about
yourself or you start a diet for like
one day and you feel really good you
haven't really changed that much I mean
like good credit to you for going for
that run but one run is not going to
drastically change your cardiovascular
system but you feel incredibly better
like proportionately to how you felt
before
because you've taken action and
ultimately that's how we judge ourselves
we judge ourselves based on our action
and on a relative nature to what we've
been doing before so make progress in
any area of your life and your
confidence is going to grow easiest way
to change it there's areas of your life
you feel really bad about take action do
something about that area and you'll
feel good about it soon if not instantly
my second favorite strategy for changing
your confidence for feeling more
confident is to change your comparison
points if you are spending your days on
Facebook and Instagram looking at really
successful people showing you only the
best parts of their life you are not
going to feel good there's no way around
that so as people we base a lot of our
confidence and our self-image on
comparison to other people to ourselves
to our goals to what we see around us
and one of the easiest ways for a better
or worse to change our confidence is to
change our comparison points so first
thing I would do just very simple action
item here Facebook newsfeed Eradicator
if you're accessing facebook on your
computer you install it as a plugin for
Chrome and it blocks your newsfeed so no
longer do you see anyone stuff you can
go on Facebook you can post you can
message but you're not seeing that feed
that's designed to steal hours of your
day and ultimately your self-esteem as
well that would be my action item I
would also consider limiting time on
things like Instagram and all that
personally I spend very little time on
these platforms I find when I do nine
times out of 10 I don't leave with a
great feeling whether it's because I
wasted a ton of time or because of
comparison point and looking at other
people and then that somehow affecting
my beliefs about myself my absolute
favorite strategy for becoming more
confident by far just goes kind of fun
is sharing vulnerabilities and we all
have things that were really insecure
about right and what we usually do is we
bottle those up we hide them inside and
when we're out in a group in public we
do everything we can to cover up our
vulnerabilities right to hide anything
we're insecure about because then people
judge us but what does this do of course
it makes us feel more and more insecure
I said before that I believe you know we
kind of watch ourselves and our how we
see our selves take action and what we
do affects how we feel about ourselves
so if you see yourself hiding this
vulnerability making it the worst thing
in the world it's going to become more
and more ingrained and you're gonna feel
worse and worse about it what I love to
do is share these vulnerabilities is to
if I'm out with a group of people who
are so smart and they're sharing
whatever they happen to know about
politics or history which are not areas
that I am great at because vulnerability
here I'm terrible at remembering names
so I will read an entire book about
history and I'll take away the theories
and the stories but I cannot remember
the names and the dates but when you're
hanging out with academic type people
then you sound really stupid compared to
them right because they are like oh well
what was the name of that person like I
don't know there was a guy in Italy and
he invented something with accounting
and it was really cool because it
changed how people the business it was
roughly in the 14 or 15th century and
that's just how my mind worked
and I'm sure there's ways I could
improve it I could take some course on
memory but at the time at the moment I
don't have time for that or that much of
an interest so what I've found I do is I
just share that vulnerability with
people and it makes me feel a lot better
about it and just accept that hey I have
flaws and there's things I'm good at but
the other really cool thing about
sharing vulnerabilities sharing
insecurity sharing things you're scared
of all this kind of thing is it gives
other people permission to open up above
themselves when you start showing that
hey I'm not bulletproof I have
insecurities I'm not perfect people like
you more people open up to you more and
what is really cool about it is it
actually makes you appear more confident
because someone who's really insecure
right what do we say when you meet
someone who seems ultra confident and
doesn't you know isn't willing to be
proven wrong and thinks they're the
smartest bird in the room most people
like yeah that person's really insecure
right they're trying to cover up their
insecurities so when you are open about
hey I suck at this I'm
scared of this I'm a normal human being
actually what ends up happening is
people see you as more confident which
is just a bonus of it because you're
actually going to feel more confident
feel more open be more self accepting of
yourself this is one of my favorite
things to do and sometimes do because it
can be really awkward right and one of
my books on being confident I have a
chapter about telling awkward or bad
jokes or telling jokes that are just for
yourself because when you do something
like when you're in a group and you know
that the joke will be funny too like
your brother or your best friend or
someone but they're not there and
everyone in the group will think the
joke is stupid and you tell the joke
anyhow it kind of tells that you know
little person on your shoulder watching
you like I don't give a fuck what they
think and that is one of my favorite
ways to boost confidence is just to do
things for yourself not tear as much
about what other people think and
sharing vulnerabilities and telling
jokes that only you think are funny or
two of my favorite ways to do it if you
made it this far in the video putting up
with my terrible attempts at humor and
interesting view on life I'd encourage
you to subscribe and put out new content
each and every week on psychology
personal development freelancing
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For more infomation >> Дима Данилов feat. NaCI - Одни мечты (Премьера трека 2018) - Duration: 3:25. 
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