(fast paced music)
- Welcome back to the Depression Olympics.
Where you're joining us live
at the Women's Getting Out of Bed Finals.
- And all eyes are on Amanda Rosenberg
of Team Great Britain.
- Although, critics have said that getting married recently
could hurt her chances of snagging Depression gold.
- Although, if her marriage is anything like mine,
it's only increased her chancing of winning the gold.
(whistle)
- Okay.
There's the whistle and she is starting
with the classic head under the covers.
There's a little bit of movement.
There's gonna be a deduction for that.
Really breaks the illusion of death
and that's what the judges are looking for.
- And
here comes the first peep.
Looks around.
A really smooth transition back under the covers.
Nicely done.
- Now let's talk about Rosenberg for a second here
because I've been following her career for quite some time.
She's a triple threat.
How else are we gonna say it?
We're talking about depression, anxiety, PTSD.
She's got it all.
- But let's not forget last year,
at the World Anxiety Championships,
where she placed third in Crying at Work,
second in Crying Everywhere Else
and took home the Gold for Sitting Alone
in the Dark While Thinking About the Worst of Things.
- Nooo.
- Here's the first no.
Soft, distressed.
Nice.
- Nooo! - A little harsher.
- The way that she conveys her inner anguish
through one word, it's just beautiful.
- Nooo! (crying)
- Loud with a cry at the end.
So pained.
Magnificent.
This is textbook crying, Julie.
- And she's straight into the stare at the ceiling
and contemplate death.
Now this move requires maximum concentration
and it looks like...
Oh.
Yes.
She's clearly numb and wants out.
(fast paced music)
- Noooo!
- [Siri] I can help you find a place
if you turn on location services.
- We're coming up to the three hour mark
which means we're going to looking at a dismount
as she's launched herself onto the floor!
Oh my God.
She's an absolute mess and it's amazing.
- Stuck the landing, face first.
Wow, that is perfection.
- Watch your back China because Rosenberg is back
and she's more depressed than ever.
Sorry folks here.
Seems to be something going on.
What are we looking at here?
- Don't know.
It appears as though, instead of staying on the floor
and worming herself to the bathroom.
Rosenberg appears to want to be...
I mean I wanna say standing?
- [Bob] This is unprecedented
and completely unprecedented.
I honestly don't know what to say here.
- I mean, I don't know what to think Bob.
Are we going to see a walk?
As we all know, any walking results in
an immediate disqualification.
- You know, in 20 years of covering the Depression Olympics,
I have not once seen anyone upright.
- Hold on, Hold on.
She's turning.
She's facing the bed and...
Oh, look at that.
- Can't believe what we're seeing with our eyes right now.
- Rosenberg has stunned us all
with a double back, double face first bed dismount remount.
Unbelievable stuff.
Just when you thought you'd seen it all.
Just when you thought you knew
exactly how depressed Rosenberg was.
- This is what I love about the Depression Olympics.
You never know what you're gonna get
and that's what makes it so fun.
- [Julie] What she did today was original.
It was expertly executed (coughing)
and it was a Gold Medal winning performance.
- Don't go away because we've got the Men's
I Don't Need to Talk to Anyone Relay
coming up right after these messages.
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