David: In this video, we're going to give you three tips for healing after sexual abuse.
Heather: Plus, stay to the end for a secret weapon to help you start healing from childhood
trauma.
I'm Heather.
David: And I'm David.
Heather: From Zen Rose Garden.
David: .com.
Heather: Yes.
David: Helping people create ... Heather: ... BADASS lives.
David: Let's get started.
Both: Tip number one.
Heather: You are not alone.
David: One in four girls and one in six boys, by the time they are age 12 have experienced
some type of sexual abuse or sexual trauma.
Heather: There are many aspects on your journey to healing from sexual abuse.
I'm not going to lie, it's a long journey to get there.
David: It takes courage to start your journey to heal sexual abuse and to heal sexual trauma,
but you are not alone.
There are plenty of other people out there that have gone through experiences like this.
Reach your hand out, and you will find somebody who wants to help.
Both: Tip number two.
Heather: Trust your memories.
David: Keep in mind that the human brain is designed to protect itself from pain.
What it will do is when an event like this takes place, it will take those memories,
and it will compress them down into a small of an area as possible to protect you from
those memories.
Those are what are called repressed memories.
David: We'll repress that pain until a trigger event takes place.
When a trigger event takes place, which could be a smell, it could be something that you
see, it could be somebody that reminds you of somebody, those memories will start coming
up to the surface.
It could also lead to spontaneous regression where you go back to that place in your brain
that holds the pain, and you end up acting like that age that same event took place.
Heather: Number one problem when something happens to a child is that they tell someone,
and they are not believed.
You may be, as an adult, still reacting to this fear that you are not going to be believed.
First, believe yourself, trust yourself, and then move forward with finding the best path
for your healing.
David: So, the number one key is to trust yourself.
Tip ... Heather: Number three.
David: It was not your fault.
Heather: It was not your fault.
Very often, as adults, we look back on our younger self, our child self, and not just
with sexual abuse or sexual trauma, but with anything, and we judge ourselves based on
what we know now as adults.
So now, we have the emotional maturity to look back and make better decisions for ourself
when we were 7, or 6, or 5, or 4, or 12, or whatever the case may be.
But, the fact is we did not have the emotional maturity at those younger ages that we do
now, so don't judge yourself on what happened to you back then.
There was nothing you could've done about it.
You made the best decisions you could for yourself at that time.
David: That child didn't know how to use those tools, so stop judging yourself for that.
Realize, also, that back then, you were afraid of losing the love that you were receiving,
even if it was dysfunctional.
Heather: As a child, you're just learning about love and what love is.
There are people that you're supposed to trust, so you're getting really confused as a child,
which makes it even muddier.
You don't have the clarity to really know what to do with what's happening to you at
that age, so forgive yourself.
David: The most important key element is to forgive your child self, because they did
the best they could with what they knew then.
Heather: It was not your fault.
David: It wasn't then, and it's not now.
Both: Now it's time ... David: ... for the bonus tip.
Heather: The BONUS TIP.
David: Create a safe place to heal.
Heather: There are three reasons for this.
The first is to reclaim your power.
Now, victims of sexual abuse feel helpless.
They feel powerless.
Their identity has been shattered at a very young age, so they need a safe space to reclaim
that power safely.
David: And, put those pieces back together in a way that makes you whole again, which
brings us to the second purpose and reason for creating a safe place and safe space to
heal, and that is to reprogram your beliefs.
Reprogram your belief system with a guide that is qualified to walk you through the
process of reprogramming, because all those things you thought about yourself back then
are likely not true.
Heather: Right, and you've been operating with those false, damaging, subconscious beliefs
for a very long time.
You don't even know what they are.
You've accepted them as truth for so long that they're part of you.
Find that person who can help unravel that ball of yarn and get you back to emotional,
and mental, and spiritual health.
Heather: The third reason is to receive guidance from a professional in sexual trauma therapy
for real, concrete world actions moving forward and healing in your life.
It is really helpful to have a professional who has guided others through this process,
and perhaps even been through it themselves, to help you on that journey to healing, and
decide what actions are right for you and what actions are wrong for you.
David: Because what is right for one, is not necessarily right for another.
Seeking professional guidance and assistance while you're going through this process of
rebuilding yourself, and taking the right actions moving forward is going to be in your
best interest, but you got to find somebody that you trust that creates that safe place
and space for you to heal.
Heather: So, now it's time for secret weapon.
We created a special bonus meditation to help you on your journey to start healing childhood
trauma.
David: Click the link in the description to get it.
Heather: It's TRUTH BOMB time.
David: TRUTH BOMB time.
Heather: Leave your TRUTH BOMB moments and any questions you have in the comments below.
David: If you liked this video, hit the like button.
Heather: Now, think of at least two people who need this information, and share it with
anyone that comes to mind.
David: If you're ready to take your BADASS life to the next level ...
Heather: Be sure to subscribe.
David: And, click that bell to turn notifications on ...
Heather: ... so you're the first to know ... David: ... when we drop a video ...
Heather: ... or go live.
David: Thanks for watching.
Heather: We'll see you in the next video.
David: We'll see you in the next video.
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